But I am not a crazy couponer. I don't not have a binder, and I do not dumpster dive for coupons that people have thrown out. Seriously, who the fuck does that? Oh yeah, that woman on Extreme Couponing. That same woman made her pregnant friend dumpster dive with her. I can't even, y'all.
However, I WILL throw some serious shade/side eye or just flat out tell you to put down the last bowl of $.85 easy mac since you already have 20 in your cart. YOU DON'T NEED THAT MANY. But I do, so gtfo of my way and lemme have 'em.
I will also stock up on $1.19 jars of pasta sauce and $3 boxes of tampons because you can't get stuff for THAT CHEAP anywhere else. Yes I know dollar stores and Aldi have them, but my favorite brands are super cheap, and they're the bigger boxes. This shit will last me for months, y'all. I normally shop at Kroger and HEB, but especially Kroger when they're having their "Mega Event" sale. Combined with coupons, you can save a SHIT ton of money. My goal is to save somewhere between 40-60%. The past 2 trips, I have saved 53% and 67%. IT WAS AWESOME. Truth be told, the planets have to align for me to save that much. Stuff that I will actually use will be on sale, and there will be matcing coupons for those items. It's a perfect storm for saving some serious cashola. I normally will save about 30-50% on a normal trip. It's no 97%, but it's still money saved. Please don't ask me what I do with my savings, because I don't have a budget, so I just aim to spend less than $200 a month on groceries. I should note that it's just me and GS in the apartment, but food-wise it feels like there's 6. -_-
For example, Tuesday morning (8/4), my total went from $148 to $81, for a savings of 43%. Mind you, I would've saved more, but they were out of several items that I needed, so I'm going to have to go to another Kroger. Boo! And, I normally shop on Sunday mornings, but this was the only free time that I had, so we ended up at Kroger at 6:15 in the morning. DO NOT GO TO KROGER AT 6:15 IN THE MORNING. Worst. Idea. Ever. Cleaning crews, stockers everywhere. Shouldn't that shit be finished already?! Uggghhhh. Oh, and there were no actual cashiers, just the self check outs. I was pretty happy with my purchase, however. I'm still looking for that receipt, but I did go for round 2 on Sunday (8/9), so I'll post that one here. I took my mom with me so that she could see me in action, and in case I needed someone to make an extra purchase for me. She ended up buying a few things for herself, and she was also very excited once her final total showed up on the screen. I think it went from $46 to $32. Not bad for her first time!
The picture isn't the best, but I had a coupon for every item that was purchased. All the darker print is money off each item. BOO-YAH.
Now, I will also say that I do get 4 papers on Sunday, which gives me more coupons to save money. I don't hover over the ads and match up the coupons, ain't nobody got time for that! I have 2 websites that I cross-reference that do the heavy work for me. I just have to either print or clip my coupons, and I'm ready to go! I like to call myself a "Lazy" couponer as opposed to a "Crazy" one. It takes me about an hour to prepare, sometimes more, sometimes less, it just depends on how the sale is running. The Kroger Mega Event always has a Buy X, Save $X (ex Buy 5, Save $5, Buy 4, Save $4), so you have to plan the trip around quantities and coupons. If you don't make the mark, you don't get the discount. That is absolutely crucial to a couponer. I always have my quantities and coupons sorted out before I hit the store. Usually, if I'm short an item or two to make the amount needed, they always have items that are .99, which couponers call them filler items. Almost everytime, I get Goldfish. Okay everytime. BUY ALL THE GOLDFISH. Seriously, can you every really get enough? No, you can't.
Hoe-kay. So I think that's it for couponing. If you have any questions/comments, just leave 'em here and I'll get to them when I can!